For most of the years I have been playing, I had a saying. I would say that 'There are lots of people who play and sing better than I do, but no one enjoys it any more." That remains true, though in the last year, I feel as though I have lost a bit of that joy. Not in my core, but some in my exhibition of the joy I am feeling when I play.
It may have something to do with the stroke I had the summer of 2009, and it may not. It has happened since that time though. I first noticed it on some of the recordings we had made of performances. After listening to them, I told David (Buck) that something was missing to me. It did not sound like I was having fun. I wasn't telling many jokes, or even talking a lot. After hearing those playbacks, I started noticing it as it was happening. I wasn't as quick as normal, wasn't moving much or tapping my toes even. I was still experiencing joy inside, but it wasn't bubbling to the outside. I would find that I wasn't even smiling much of the time, and that was not the me I had been for so long.
So as I am getting started again on a solo performance road, I find myself working on songs and picking, singing, stories and jokes, and in finding the joy to share with my audience. It is there, I just have to make sure it shows. Music has to be fun to you or it will be too much work. It does take a lot of time to practice, to travel, and to perform. But it is always worth it to me. Before I was taking Blood pressure medicine, I found that performing would lower my blood pressure. Now that I am a Type 2 Diabetic, I have found that performing lowers my blood sugar just as much as walking does. It has health benefits for me, as well as spiritual and soul enriching benefits. I do love to play and perform. And I thank those of you who come out to support me as I do.
I look forward to seeing you down the road. If I don't have a smile, give me one of yours.
Nelson
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment